Disclaimer: If you are easily offended by any discussion of race that doesn’t end in “let’s all hold hands and share love across the world because in the end we’re all one race:the human race” then stop reading this now. If you just so happen to not be Black and are deeply disturbed by the thought of any people other than White people carrying privilege in the US, you too should close the browser page now. If you are Black and also are uncomfortable with this notion, you need to first close this page THEN go evaluate your life and realize you are Black in America. If you do not enjoy an outpouring of Black pride, run in the polar OPPOSITE direction of this post…everyone else, enjoy yourself.
If you didn’t know this I’m Black.
Have been all my days and, from what I understand, will be the rest of my days. I love fried chicken and watermelon *gasp*, yes I said it, I love fried chicken and watermelon. Why? Because fried chicken is delicious and was clearly crafted by the hands of the one true God himself. Watermelon is a delectable, nutritious treat that has all type of health benefits and is the perfect fruit to cool one off in the horrid heat of summer. Well why does this matter because the Black being and fried chicken/watermelon has been historically linked and more times than not it’s been a negative link. Why, you ask, would anyone have an issue with food being associated with a race?
Well probably because of this:
Both of these pictures portray a degradation of the Negro to a less than functioning normal human being. I once was trying to pick what to order at a restaurant on a school trip, where I was of course the only person of color, and when I told a guy standing next to me that I think I’ll have the fried chicken meal (it was quick, cheap, and the only thing I trusted on the menu, honestly) he giggled and said to me “how stereotypical” and proceeded to continue laughing as if he wanted me to join in on his oh so clever joke
…..I gave him no laughs.
Anyways, there are several things in my life that I do, not because I’m Black, but because I just have a personal preference for them. I know plenty Black people who hate fried chicken and watermelon because they just don’t enjoy the taste of them.
BUT there also things that come with the territory of being Black in America that I’m quite pleased with and here’s a list of some of them. Mind you I’m not saying all Blacks do, or like, these things, or anything…I’m not speaking for my entire race because last time I checked there was about a millon katrillion Black people in the world and at the last “Who’s Gonna Speak for Black Folks This Year” convention I was not appointed the title.
I can walk out of most awkward situations scot free
Any one who knows me in person, knows that I can be hella awkward. I remember one time my brother introduced me to a friend of his and for some reason I got distracted and forgot how to respond to the person he was introducing me to so I just stood there for like ten whole seconds, smiling nervously and not saying anything until my brother finished his introduction of me by saying “…and she’s awkward.” But I noticed that in the majority of awkward situations I am in, even if the awkwardness is mostly my fault, most people of other races don’t acknowledge me as the source and even if they do then I become the awkward Black girl which is now a thing since Issa Rae went and made it all popular. I’m not sure why, maybe it’s because my swagga is on a trillion all the time and therefore people overlook my moment of awkward or they assume I’m naturally cool (cuz Black folks are cool) and that this was only a exceptional case in which I had a moment’s slip up from my usual coolness. Either way, it works out.
I Get To Pull The Race Card….
…because most situations are racist.
Being a Sociology Graduate Student and having an emphasis in race, I’ve learned all kinds of different ways racism runs through the very vein of America (if you don’t believe me, google redlining, the KKK, Manifest Destiny, lynching, Trayvon Martin, Mass Incarceration, the Trail of Tears, American Slavery, etc.). So once you open your eyes and see how racism has been institutionalized in America you start to see how everything from popular music to hiring practices to real estate discrimination to beauty standards are actually really, really racist. And of course if you’re in America and not White you are probably the one being discriminated against. That being said, I’m not one for pulling the race card very much (not because it’s not valid but because most people won’t listen to you even if you do) but in some cases, like my mother being passed over by service clerks in department/upscale stores because her hair is always in two-strand twists and she doesn’t look affluent , I will pull that bad boy out in a heartbeat.
I Get To Watch My Brothers in The Struggle Showboat Like No Other
Football season is one of the single most glorious times of my year. Nothing like watching folks throw the pigskin around while munching on some delicious finger food. As much as I love the sport I do enjoy a good showboat after a great play. If you don’t know what show boating looks like, here ya go:
The great showboaters of football, Deion Sanders, T.O. (and now Jacoby Jones), have all been Black and I must say I’m proud! Although some may call this behavior arrogant, I think if you are a boss and you do incredible feats of athleticism you get to do victory dances. The above gif is of Jacoby Jones, Baltimore Ravens player from New Orleans, at the Super Bowl this past Sunday doing a classic New Orleans dance, the Beenie Weenie. Although all these players earned their fame by their incredible skills, I comrade them on their awesome actions of showboating. Plus no one is gonna question a Black man in an end zone doing the dougie, you may not like it, but ain’t nobody gonna step to him.
My People’s Food Will Change Your Life
I have been to Europe and have been to various states around the country and up to this point in my life I can truly say that there has been no greater tasting food than food made by Black people aka Soul Food. You can diss it for its extreme unhealthiness all you want, but I bet you get a taste of my mama’s red beans and fried chicken you’d be ready to sell your house and your firstborn for another bite. Yes most Soul Food will kill you if you eat it everyday, but ain’t nobody said you supposed to be throwing back whole ham-hocks covered in lard five times a week. If you do that and have a massive heart attack which only worsens your diabetes do not call me. As healthy and fit as I try to be, I will throw a salad out the window for some good collard greens and porkchops.
No One is Hassling Me To Be Stick Thin
The Black woman is known for her hips and thighs. Black women have always been known for that because hey that’s just the way we’re built. And even though for centuries Black women were vilified for having such large derrieres and healthy bosoms, every one knows they were just hating. I’m 5’5” and around 135 pounds which is pretty average for me but thanks to my mama and ’em I got some hips, which I love because Black culture is one that celebrates the heavy chested and the big booty guhs alike. I don’t feel perpetual pressure to become a size zero. When i watch the Victoria Secret fashion show I hav n0 desire to take a lap around the greater DC area. Actually when I was younger, and was super skinny, I used to pray for the day when I would fill out a pair of jeans properly because I wanted to be big fine like all the other girls. And the day I got a little weight and some curves I was like :
Men have written odes to the Black woman’s physique (i.e. Sir Mix A Lot, 2Chainz) and to that I say huzzah! I mean yes some of these songs are completely misogynistic and should never be heard by any child ever, but let’s just ignore that for a second and give them an A for effort.
I mean Black people have made GINORMOUS contributions to music across the world. We got jazz, hip hop, blues, soul, neo-soul, R & B, rock and roll. All these genres are inseparable from the legacy of Black people. We have rhythm in our spirit, from our dance moves(and yes I’m aware there are Black folk with no rhythm) to our voices to our swagger, we are some musical folks. Trace it all the way back to Africa or the various islands we’ve been dispersed to, we are some grooving people and I’m super proud of that cultural background.
Perseverance Is Basically Built Into Our History
We survived slavery and Jim Crow and we’re still here….enough said.
Well guys that’s all I got for this post. I’d love to hear what you love about your race or what privileges you get because of it, whether you’re Black, Latino, White, Asian, or East Sudanese, I’d love to hear it.
Happy Black People Being Great Month,
-Brini Weenie aka the Briister, aka @kewl_briize
“He is my loving God and my fortress, my stronghold and my deliverer, my shield, in whom I take refuge, who subdues peoples under me.”-Psalm 144:2